the "delta phi delta artist sarah kellogg award for 2004"

that was my formal award, from nicole soboleski. i enjoy it, and it is hanging on my closet door.

i have to wonder (again), after last night, why i did this to myself. join a social group, i mean. so someone makes decisions that aren't necessarily the best thing they could have done. well, so what. it didn't hurt anyone, and it didn't even have anything to do with anyone else in the group. there is no reason whatsoever to demean and say things about the person to them. none whatsoever. and it's frustrating, then, to other people in the group, because then we have to deal with it when really, we should be spending our time supporting the person after they make a decision they might regret instead of having to support them when they are feeling attacked on top of it. if that makes any sense. and then, of course, it just leaves a lot of people feeling like they aren't having a good time.

but i'm not sure how much of a great time i would have had anyway, just because i'm sick. i couldn't really drink, and the hotel people were patrolling the hallways like hawks because of the noise, and then i was actually having a fun conversation with someone when another person intruded, causing me to become annoyed and frustrated and leave.

but i did talk to someone i've known since first block freshman year, and he told me that he had a crush on me and would have asked me out, except that some *other* person beat him to it. i was definitely flattered, and considering the two people, wish that he had because this other person...yeah...

anyway, i'm still really tired. michelle gave me an extension on the paper and as a result slept all afternoon instead of working on it. i also finished angels and demons today, which i didn't think was as good as the da vinci code but a good read, nonetheless. i procrastinate too much.